College Road Trip
by SlytherinHippie
Summary: Edward and his family all go on a crazy college road trip... with the Volturi and Flava Flav. Meanwhile Jacob and his friends host a party in the Cullen house while the Cullens are away. ReviewandRate. UPDATE:Ch.4 Finding Flava Flav in the luggage.
1. College Road Trip?

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of it's characters.

Chapter 1

**College Road Trip?**

I got the call the night before from Aro, Marcus, and Caius.

" What do you want?" I growled through my breath.

" You're going on a college road trip, right?" It was Aro.

" Uh yeah. So?"

" Hmmm."

" Okay. We won't, like, expose our secret you know. Our vamp secret."

Aro laughed heartily in the phone. " I wasn't asking for that!"

" Then what?"

" Can I come with you?"

" What?!?" I coughed. Alice stopped putting our luggage in the Range Rover to look at me.

" On your college road trip."

" I know."

" Well?"

" Aren't you a little too old?"

" Nonsense!" And with that, the phone went dead.

" Everyone!" I waved. " Aro, Marcus, and Caius are coming with us!"


	2. Here we go

Chapter 2

**Here we go**

Aro came the next morning, dressed in a bright pink Hawaiian shirt and tan trousers, with socks and sandals.

Edward could only stare. " What…the…heck."

Aro gave a flirtatious smile. " You like, Eddie Cullen? You know you love it!"

Edward gulped. " I think black cloaks fit you…more."

Behind Aro were Marcus and Caius, in the same outfit.

" Yah!!!" yelled Alice from the Range Rover. " Come on Volturi! We've leaving!!!"

" Buttie but but," retorted Caius. " Where's Jane going to sit?"

" Jane?" Edward asked in shock. There he saw Jane in a summer dress, looking dull.

" Now how many did you bring with you?" Rosalie asked.

Aro, Marcus, and Caius moved out of the way.

Behind them were about 20 of the Volturi, including Demetri and Felix in their bathing suits, grinning like idiots.

Edward could only stare.


	3. House Sitters

Chapter 3

House Sitters

Everyone was in the cars; Bella, Rosalie, and Jasper in the Range Rover and Edward, Alice, Emmet, and Nessie in an old, broke down Ford F250.

" CARLISLE!" yelled Edward. " What the heck is this? A truck?!?"

Carlisle waved his hand. " Sorry Edward." And with that he was gone.

Edward called hopelessly, " But how are we going to bring the Volturi? They can't fit inside…"

" Yeah Edwarders! Going on the trip to part-ai!!! Uh uh! Whoooo!" Caius shrieked. The rest of the Volturi were having a break dancing contest, Demetri currently doing the moon walk.

Edward cast Caius a strange look. " Caius, don't ever…just…never…what are…."

Edward just took off and leaped inside the Cullen house where he found Carlisle bringing his bags out.

Edward asked, " Where are you going?"

Carlisle smiled. " Esme and I are going to Italy. Why? You didn't know?"

Edward groaned. " Forgot. Who's going to watch our house? Some kids are going to toilet paper the trees before you know it."

The answer to Edward's question came that instant.

_BAM!!!_

Jacob, Quil, and Embry had knocked the front door down. All three looked up at the Cullens and gave apologetic smiles.

" THEY'RE WATCHING THE HOUSE?" asked Edward incredulously as the three sauntered over, laying their booze on the coffee table.

" Yeah we are. You can count on us," said Jacob taking a long swig of whiskey.

" Of course they are. They're responsible as you can see," said Carlisle motioning towards the wolves. Jacob, Quil, and Embry were all trying to do air guitars, breaking off a leg of the coffee table in the process.

" Whatever you say Carlisle," muttered Edward, giving his papa a hug and then closing the front door. Before he shut it he heard a muted, " When the Cullens are gone, I swear I'm tearing the roof off this house…"

Edward jumped down all the steps and resumed checking all the luggage.

A few teenagers wandered across the lawn. " Excuse me?" prompted Edward, coming towards them. " Is there anything you…need?"

The girl with the nose ring answered nasally, " Uh. Yeah. I guess. The guy who owns this place, Jacob Black I think, is having this really cool party tonight with like a hundred guests. I just coming early so I can drop off some beer. He also kinda told me to sneak around the back 'cause he'd get in trouble by _them_. I'm not sure what he meant by _them_…"

Edward faced the house, and screamed with every bit of energy he had

, " JAAACCCOOBBBB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


	4. Yeah Boy!

Chapter 4

**Yeah Boy!**

When Edward had finished screaming at Jacob, Carlisle towed him outside.

Carlisle said cautiously, " That's enough Edward. You'll have to learn how to control your temper."

" Who gives a rat's --."

" College Road Trip or anger management class? Hmm?"

Edward grumbled and sped to the waiting cars.

" Dang!" yelled Renesmee from the back seat of the Ford truck to Edward. " What's taking so long? You seriously can't be serious about locking me in the truck with _this_ freak."

At the mention of his name, Emmet stuck his head out of the same window, Nessie pretend gagging. He asked, " Edward! Can ya go get my PSP? Please?"

Edward yelled, " No!"

Emmet gave his googly eyes, shiny with fresh tears.

Edward groaned. " Fine. Where is it?"

" In the back of the Range Rover."

Edward searched through the luggage there. He looked through a total of three bags and found nothing. " Damn it."

A black duffel bag lay to the side. Edward paused, wondering what must be in it. He hadn't remembered packing it in there. He reached for it and then stopped. It was shaped as if something _living_ was in there.

Edward, with trembling fingers, unzipped the bag all the way. That was about as far as he got.

An African American male, no shirt, a tin Viking hat on his bald head, and a large glossy golden clock around his neck, sat upright in the bag.

" WOAH!" yelled Edward, falling back a few feet. " What the hell --."

The man in the bag cussed some and then said, " Yeah boy! It's Flavor Flav!"

" Flava?" Edward asked quizzically. " What were _you_ doing in our luggage?"

" Baby you don't want to know."

And with that, Flava jumped out and started hopping around – naked.

Edward shielded his eyes. " Dude, put on some clothes."

Aro came around the corner, taking a break from the break dancing competition. He screamed out, " Flavor Flav!!!" when he saw the naked man.

Flava and Aro manhugged each other and Aro dissolved into conversation, " I didn't know you were going to be coming with us, Flavor Flav!"

Edward was startled. " Wait, he's coming --."

Aro flashed Edward a glare. " Excuse you Eddie. Flava and I are having a conversation. So anyway, I thought you were filming your new reality series with MTV?"

Flava shook his head, clock swinging back and forth. " Nah. I wanted to take a break. Visit my old vampire friend."

Edward ushered them both towards the cars and ran to get the other Volturi. It was time to leave.


End file.
